Bonded (The Raegan Mason Trilogy) Read online

  I climbed the next set of stairs to the watch room. From this height, I could see most of the island and the ship channel. I was amazed at the beauty of the morning and the rainbows reflected on the floor of the watch room. I looked toward the beach and guided my eyes toward the Rock. I could see it from here, not detailed, but enough to know I would have been visible from here a few nights ago. Questions filled my head. Was Kyler there that night? He had to have been. The music was the same. Ok, so if he was there, what happened? Why can I hear music when he’s around? What did that have to do with my headaches?

  I walked around the parapet looking out. There was a glass door leading out to the railed walkway outside. I pulled the handle down and pushed the door open. The wind was cool and moist with the sea breeze. I stayed close to the glass wall behind me. My fear of heights overwhelmed me and I paused to catch my breath. I closed my eyes and breathed deeply washing away the sudden surge of vertigo. I looked off in the direction we drove from last night and noticed Kyler’s motorcycle parked on the gravel driveway. I stared confused trying to feel his presence but failed. Did he walk somewhere? I looked back toward the beach and willed my feet to move around the lighthouse gallery. Was he surfing? Annoyed with myself, I returned to the watch room and descended the stairwell. I could always call him, I told myself, knowing I wouldn’t try just yet. I returned to the bedroom and flopped down on the bed. I lay my arm across my forehead to block the sun and tried to fall asleep again. I lay there for a while with sleep avoiding me. “This is useless.” I muttered as I sat up. Maybe a shower would clear my head. I gathered the melted icepacks and walked down the last flight of stairs into the living area. After returning the ice packs to the freezer, I went into the bathroom and turned on the shower.

  The hot water felt good. It reminded me of his touch but not as pleasant. I let the water run down my back loosening the tight muscles in my chest. My rib still throbbed but not as bad. The swelling in my face was down too. I stood in the water until the hot water began to cool. I turned off the water and stepped out into the fog that filled the room. I grabbed a clean towel from the cabinet and wrapped it around my body. My ruined clothes were in the trash can beside the toilet and I began to put on the borrowed clothes when I heard a knock at the bathroom door. My heart stopped. I didn’t hear Kyler’s music or feel his presence like I had before. My heart started pounding. What if Nate found me? I quickly pulled on the clothes and turned the doorknob to peek around the door, grabbing the plunger for a weapon just in case.

  Kyler was standing smiling at me with a bag of donuts in his hand. “Are you hungry?” he smiled looking me from head to toe. I swallowed hard remembering to breathe, dropping the plunger behind the door.

  “Um, I ate some cereal just a while ago.” Confusion covered my face. We were a foot away from each other and I couldn’t hear anything as before. His brow furrowed as he saw the confusion on my face.

  “Are you okay?” He asked, placing the donuts on the counter and reaching to move my wet hair from my face.

  “I, um, what happened? I can’t feel…hear…” I struggled to find the words to describe what I felt before. I felt disconnected.

  He looked at me, his sapphire eyes searching mine. “I took care of some things.” He simply stated.

  I looked at him and asked, “What did you do to me?”

  Shock covered his face.

  “Nothing!” he said incredulously, and looked away from me.

  “I don’t remember anything after we kissed last night, and now I can’t feel you!” I stood there with my hair dripping wet on the borrowed shirt.

  “I found a way to stop that for now.” He said looking down. “Nothing happened after the kiss. You fainted and I put you in bed and put some ice packs on your ribs. I made sure you were safe and locked the door to go…take care of some things. Did you sleep well?” He wouldn’t look me in the eye.

  “Why would you stop whatever that was between us? I feel so empty now.” I walked toward him and reached out to touch him. The jolt of electricity was still there, but muted. There was still pleasure, but not as intense. “And, no I did not sleep well. I had a really bad nightmare.”

  He looked at my hand touching his arm and breathed a sigh. “I’m sorry you didn’t sleep well. I was hoping you would feel safe here. Now it’s easier to tolerate. I couldn’t bear to hurt you.” He whispered, still not meeting my gaze.

  “Hurt me? You weren’t hurting me.” He chuckled and I braced myself for the surge that didn’t come.

  “You enjoy losing control?” He looked at me from beneath his messy hair, a crooked smile on his face. “You wouldn’t have been able to stop...and it took everything I had in me to stop last night. Would you have regretted anything?” He raised an eyebrow and stared through me.

  “I, um, no I don’t, I would have…” Mortification covered my face as I felt the full impact of his comments. We were that close last night and I didn’t care at the time, but now with my brain in control and not my hormones or whatever the controlling factor may have been, I was certainly not ready to give up that part of me, yet.

  He laughed again. “See, I didn’t want to hurt you.” He pulled me closer to him and I could still feel heat, but again it was less intense. “Isn’t this, easier?

  “Sort of, but what did you do exactly?” I looked up into his hypnotic eyes, but the urge to throw myself hopelessly at him was not there. I still wanted to be with him, but it was not the uncontrollable magnetism like last night.

  He looked at me and wrinkled his nose. “I’d rather not get into the details right now. It’s a little complicated and well, I don’t think you’d understand.”

  I pushed away from him and glared at him. “Are you questioning my ability to understand?”

  He smiled wickedly at me and pulled me close again. “Not at all, I just don’t think you’d understand this.” His gaze melted my anger and I yearned to kiss him again. Not the same uncontrollable urge I had last night, but a true desire. I rose up on my tip toes, hesitantly, to reach my arms around his neck expecting him to pull away. He met me half way and gently kissed me. Emotions rushed through me that I hadn’t felt last night. Tenderness, protection, love. The kiss wasn’t as passionate, but it still got my blood pumping.

  He released me from the embrace and smiled at me. “Control is better now.” I wasn’t sure if he was telling me he was in control, or stating that I was.

  “Can you tell me anything?” I asked, trying to use my power of persuasion on him.

  He laughed and trailed his finger tips over my cheek bone where the faintest bruise was developing. His eyes flashed like blue flames before returning to normal as he grabbed my hand. “I can tell you that you’re beautiful and brave. I am honored to be in your presence.” He made a bowing motion and kissed my hand. “Your chariot awaits, my lady.” He motioned to the door. Frustrated beyond my limits, I stomped to the door.

  I was tense the whole ride back into town. I held on to him but didn’t feel the strong surges of electricity flow through us as before. We stopped at the boardwalk near Julie’s house. He said it would be best if we didn’t arrive at her house directly seeing me dressed in his clothes. He pulled a bag from the saddle bag on the side of his motorcycle and tossed some clothes to me. There was a pair of denim shorts and a top similar to the one I wore the night before. I stared at him dumbfounded. “I left you last night and went to find something close to what you were wearing. You don’t need to be interrogated by Julie more than normal.” He smiled, dimples flashing.

  “Thanks, but she’ll be digging for details anyway. What am I supposed to tell her?” Nothing would please me more than to blurt out the fact that we spent the evening together, but I wasn’t positive what that meant. Did that mean we were actually together? I tried not to let the hope of that scenario come to the surface, but it was too hard not to hope.

  “You can tell her whatever you feel comfortable telling her.” He raised his eyebrows mischievously.
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  “Ugh! Can’t you give a straight answer to anything? I feel like I’m talking to the Riddler. What is this between us?” I reformed my original question. “I don’t know what to tell her because I still don’t know what this is.” I moved my hand back and forth between us.

  His smile faded. “Tell her we’re dating. That’s the easiest explanation.” He looked disappointed but I couldn’t feel his emotions anymore.

  “Dating? Okay, we’re dating.” Hope fluttering inside me, but I tried to remain collected. “When will you explain more to me?” I asked again.

  “Soon, but right now you need to change and get to Julie’s.” He looked out toward the ocean. His eyes grew fierce and his jaw tightened. I turned behind me to find what he was focused on, fearful it would be Nate again. Nothing but water and sand stood behind me. I turned back to him to find his expression softened and a smirk lining his face. “There’s a changing tent over there. I’ll wait while you change.” He pointed to a yellow and green striped tent near the boardwalk people used to change into swimsuits. No one was out this early except for the few surfers down on the beach. I walked away reluctantly and looked back to the water expecting to find the source of his tension. The waves rolled and crashed on the shore in a rhythmic pattern.

  I returned a few minutes later dressed in clothes that were near perfect replicas of the ruined ones back at the lighthouse. It was almost 8 a.m. and I pulled the cell phone from my pocket to call Julie. I was dialing and walking back to Kyler at his motorcycle when Julie picked up on the first ring.

  “Where are you?” She shouted through the phone.

  “Relax, I’m near your house. Can I come in when I get there?”

  “Yeah, sure. So you’re okay? You didn’t return my calls. Where did you stay? What happened?” She rattled off the beginning of her interrogation.

  “I’ll talk to you when I get there.” I ended the call and stood a short distance away from Kyler. “I don’t know how much I can keep from her.” I sighed and looked up in his eyes. “Honestly, I don’t know what I can tell her seeing as I don’t know much myself.”

  “You can tell her whatever you want. I’m sure you’ll figure something out.” He smiled again and reached his hand out to me. I wanted to stay with him all day but my head was in control now. I reached for his hand and he pulled me close again. “Whatever you tell her about us, I’m more than happy to go along.” He ran his nose along my neck and kissed me gently below my ear. My legs felt unsteady and my body flushed with heat. “Control is much better.” He whispered.

  “Who are you talking about?” I gasped.

  He laughed and looked at me. “No good?” He questioned. His blue eyes sparkled in the morning light.

  “Very good, but I’m definitely not in control.” I forced my lips to his and enjoyed the pleasure of running my hands through his hair. His right arm wrapped tightly around my waist pulling me closer. The blood was beginning to boil again when he relaxed his hold on me and pulled away.

  “We’ll need to work on that then.” He dropped his arm from my waist and climbed on his motorcycle. The bike roared to life as he turned and winked at me before driving away.

  I stood there trying to collect my thoughts and composure before walking down the boardwalk to Julie’s house.

  Julie was waiting at the front door when I walked up the sidewalk. She was in obvious distress looking up and down the street for me. When I came into view, she threw open the door and ran out to me. She hugged me then punched me in my shoulder.

  “Ow! Is that necessary?” I asked her, rubbing my shoulder.

  “You’re an idiot! Where have you been? I’ve been sick worrying about you. Everyone heard what happened with Nate and when we went looking for you, all we found was him laid out on the sand with a busted mouth. He said someone jumped him from behind while you two were trying to get ‘busy’.” She air quoted and stuck her finger in her mouth trying to gag herself. “We all knew he was lying. Are you okay? Oh my God, your face! Where else did he hurt you? Who hit him? YOU???” She fired off her questions a hundred miles an hour.

  I tried walking toward the door but she stopped me and turned me to face her. “Rae, answer me!” The panic was real in her eyes but it seemed like such a long time ago and I didn’t want to relive it.

  “Look Jewels, I am okay, now. I’ll tell you what I can, but honestly everything happened so fast, I’m still trying to figure it out.” I looked her in the eye and smiled warmly at her. I didn’t need her freaked out and blabbing stuff to my Aunt Sarah. Nothing actually did happen, except I’d gone over the deep end after some mysterious guy that made my body feel and do things it never had.

  Julie let my arms go and stood up straight and then looked me up and down to make sure I wasn’t lying. “What happened, Rae? You’re battered, but you’re glowing! You’re not some kind of masochist, are you?”

  “NO!” I yelled. I felt my body blush, but for what I had no idea. I hadn’t really done anything.

  “And now you’re blushing? You’ve got to tell me everything now before I explode!” Julie looked around outside and started dragging me to her room.

  I told her everything I could from the attempted rape to Kyler saving me and taking me to the lighthouse. I told her we made out but that was as far as it went. I told her about the new clothes and the motorcycle ride to her house. I left out the music and electricity part, but explained that he made me feel “connected” in some way. I sounded crazy enough to appease her curiosity. After a while she just stared at me with her mouth slightly opened in shock. I had to call her name a few times before she acknowledged me again. “So, what do I do next?” I asked her, because I honestly didn’t know. I’d dated a few guys, but this was a different world for me. I’d kissed guys before, but this was so much more.

  Julie’s mind was turning; I could see it in her eyes. We’d been best friends forever. She knew I was in uncharted territory, but she was the only one I would trust with this. “Jewels! What do I do? I honestly think I’m in love with this guy and I don’t know the first thing about him. I could have easily given everything up for him last night if he wanted, but he didn’t even take advantage of the situation. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad he didn’t, but come on, why didn’t he?” Julie listened to me and I could tell she was deciding whether or not to tell me something. “WHAT? You’re my best friend in the world and I’m counting on you to tell me the truth.”

  Julie sighed and looked me in the eye. “Rae, I’m not positive, but like I told you the other day, there are those rumors that Kyler is…well people have said he’s…” She looked away from me and then took another deep breath. “Rae, they say he’s gay.”

  I busted out laughing the instant I heard her say it. I tried my best to stop laughing, but it was too funny. “Oh Julie, he’s definitely NOT gay!” I continued to giggle as she stared at me a bit miffed.

  “Well I’m just telling you what I’ve heard and observed the last six months that you’ve been gone! Every girl in school asked him out and he showed absolutely no interest in any of them.”

  “Every girl in school? So does that mean you too?” I had gained control of my laughter to ask her the simple question. Her face turned beet red, an obvious answer to my question. “So were there any guys he showed interest in?” I continued.

  “Well no, but come on Rae, not one single girl in school captured his interests for over six months? He didn’t even go to Prom with anyone.” She felt strong in her defense of the rumored gossip.

  “Not everyone goes to Prom, Jewels. Just because a guy doesn’t show interest in every girl in school doesn’t mean he’s gay.”

  “Well he’s definitely not normal!” She huffed and crossed her arms. That was an understatement.

  “Was he cruel about it?” I asked her sincerely.

  “Cruel about what?” She asked huffy.

  “About telling you no.” I wasn’t sure if it was still a touchy subject since I didn’t know how long ago
she asked him out.

  Julie’s faced turned red with anger and she turned on me quickly. “I NEVER asked him out! He was obviously not interested in girls until you came back from the dead! What did you do to him?”

  Now it was my turn to drop my mouth in shock. “I just shook his hand.” I finally muttered and looked away from her. Her words hurt me in ways she would never understand. “Back from the dead.” I felt the impact of the accident all over. The wound in my heart from my parents’ deaths ripped open further. I shouldn’t be alive either. It wasn’t fair. Tears ran down my nose as I grasped my knees to my chest. Guys had never been a problem between us. Julie always got the guys she wanted, I never resented her. This hurt me and I didn’t know how to fix it.

  “What does shaking his hand have to do with anything?” she asked with her voice strained under control. She hadn’t seen my tears and didn’t realize how she’d hurt me. I wiped away the tears running down my face. “Why are you crying?” Her voice went up an octave as she saw the emotion but didn’t understand.

  “It’s been a long day that’s all. I already told you, I feel a connection to him and that started the moment I shook his hand.” I didn’t know how else to explain it without sounding crazy. “I didn’t know you liked him or had any interest in him. I don’t know why you’re mad at me. You’re the one that wanted us to meet.”

  “I’m not mad at you!” She took a deep breath again. “I’m sorry I yelled at you. I didn’t actually ask him out. I knew other girls had asked him and he was very polite about not being interested. I did flirt with him and he never flirted back. Then the rumors started about him being gay and I left it at that. I always treated him like a girlfriend. He was always nice and polite. I thought for sure someone that good looking had to be gay. I guess you weren’t around for him to find interesting.” She smiled apologetically to me.